Sick Days
by koreanagirl2k
Summary: Tomoyo is nursing an under-the-weather Sakura and jealousy takes her over as Syaoran gets in her way. Homosexuality, angst. Reviews?


Sick Days  
By Meiko Song aka Koreana Girl 2k  
  
Disclaimer: I do not own CCS and am not affiliated with CLAMP. (I think you knew   
that.)  
  
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Just a few notes... There is slight homosexuality in this fic and also a theme of   
suicide, and that's why it's been rated R. Nothing too strong, but you've been   
warned. Proceed...  
  
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Ever since the dance, I've been sick. Friday? Sick. Saturday? Sick. Sunday?   
Sick. Monday? Hmm... I wonder. And Tuesday? Still sick. And all of my friends   
are getting sick now, too. Even Sakura! But I'm taking care of her, since she's more   
sick than the rest of us. She's in her room, sleeping. Her house is so warm and   
homey. I feel free, and motherly, taking care of Sakura and all...  
  
The way I see her and the way I feel for her, she'll never understand. That   
clueless, yet innocent air around her, full of life, energy, and curiosity... If only she   
knew.  
  
...Knew she made me love. Her. But I know where her heart belongs. I'm   
not clueless. I'm not innocent. I'm quite the opposite. As I nurse her back to   
health, I feel my heart pound. As I walk up these stairs, I feel my head rush. As I   
open the door to her room, her scent is quite intoxicating. I'm only 15, but I still   
think of my problem... I've never had a first kiss. I want Sakura to be mine, mine to   
hold, mine to love, mine to keep, mine to kiss. She looks so pale …her father is out   
of town, her brother is on a trip with Yukito-kun and his family. She is depending.   
On me. But as I sit down next to her, on the bed, a feeling is coming over me. Have   
you ever wanted something so badly, known you can't have it, but still, idiotically, go   
after it anyway? Well, that feeling is taking control of me and I want her now. I'm   
leaning over her, just one kiss…and…oh, crap! The doorbell! Ahh… gotta hurry   
downstairs. I have to answer the door before they leave! I hope it's not Syaoran-  
kun because I don't want him to take away my time with…her.  
  
"Ohayo gozimasu." I knew it.  
  
"Ohayo Syaoran-kun." Must you be so formal?  
  
"Is Sakura here, Tomoyo-san?" And if she is?  
  
"Hai. She's upstairs sleeping, though." Ha.  
  
"Oh… well, don't tell her I came by." Oh! Is he blushing? Where's my camera when I   
need it?!  
  
"Okay. Ja n-"  
  
"Sya-Syaoran-kun? What are you doing here?"  
  
Noooo…! Why??? What is she doing down here?  
  
"Sakura-chan, you're resting. Please don't over exert yourself!"  
  
"I'm fine, Tomoyo-chan! Don't worry! I'm just fi-"  
  
"Sakura!"  
  
"Sakura-chan!"  
  
As we both grab for her before she hits the ground, I realize that even though my   
feelings for my dearest friend are strong, she'll never feel the same way. Her heart   
belongs Syaoran. As Syaoran's heart belongs to her. As he catches her in his arms,   
I feel the tear, rip, and pain of defeat.   
  
"Tomoyo! Get a warm and wet cloth. Hurry!"  
  
I run to get the rag and feel my chest raging. Why me? Why do I have to have my   
heart broken? This is what I get for loving someone? Fine, then. Let them have it   
their way!   
  
Instead of a towel, I grab a kitchen knife. As I run up these stairs, rage takes over   
my soul. An uncontrollable, dark, black, rage. And as I break the door open, a   
shocked Sakura and Syaoran look at me.  
  
"Tomoyo-chan! What are you doing?!" Sakura…  
  
"Tomoyo-san! Put the knife down! Dammit put the knife down!" I want you to die   
so badly, but… but… I don't want Sakura to feel any pain. What kind of friend am I   
anyway? Psychotic? Obsessed? A freak? Yup, and that's why I deserve…  
  
"THIS!"  
  
As I shove the knife through my heart, I feel pain that is nothing compared to my   
heart break.  
  
"Tomoyo, NO!"  
  
"Tomoyo-chan! Tomoyo! Tomoyo! TOMOYO!!!!"  
  
"Just call the ambulance! Hurry!"  
  
Hmm… the blood pouring out of my soul… I can feel it seep through my clothes and-   
I know you'll forget about me Sakura. Go live a happy life with Syaoran. Ugghh…  
  
"Oh my God! Syaoran! She's coughing up blood! Help her!"  
  
"To-Tomoyo-san…"  
  
I struggle to get the words out, but I will.  
  
"Syaoran… You took her from me. You to-took my heart! You took Sakura!"  
  
"Wha-what?! Just hang in there!"  
  
"Don't pretend you care for me! But you… Sakura. You know, I loved you…"  
  
As everything begins to fade, I hear Syaoran yelling something like, Oh my God.   
Shit. Tomoyo, hang in there!, and Sakura is screaming and crying. The medics are   
propping me up on a cart-ish thing… and, and…  
  
"Don't leave me Tomoyo! You're my best friend! Don't leave me!"  
  
Sorry, Sakura.  
  
"Sorry, to be a burden. Good-b-bb-b…"  
  
Goodbye.  
  
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End.  
  
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This is probably one of the few dark fics I'll write and you are all probably wondering   
why I wrote this. I was inspired by Cloud Ishida's fanfic, Leap of Faith. And by CCS   
as a whole. I don't mean to be dark, but it's the plain truth. Confessing you're heart   
rarely ends happily. I wanted to show what could happen if the conflicts became   
real. That death could be involved. If you have any flames, questions, comments,   
or complements, go ahead. I'm curious to see what people think. This is my first fic   
so tell me what you thought. Ja ne,  
Meiko Song 


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